Governmentium
The only thing that saves us from bureaucracy is inefficiency. An efficient bureaucracy is the greatest threat to liberty. -- Eugene Mccarthyand:
No person is so grand or wise or perfect as to be the master of another person. -- Karl Hess
From a message in the "Ding, dong, the witch ... isn't feeling too well" mailing list thread at Project: Safe Skies, discussing Janet Reno's recent collapse during a speech:
If you look closely at the photo you'll see that Ms. Reno hasn't fainted at all...someone tossed water on her and she's melting...
Scott Bieser at Rational Review - The Groundhog looks at the State of the Union - Mr. Bieser's Groundhog sees a very frightening shadow. Cartoon commentary on the "war on terrorism".
From samizdata:
Scientists discover new element!
The August 2000 fire at the Los Alamos Laboratory had one significant consequence. A secret scientific document, discovered in a bunker whose security systems were mostly destroyed by the fire, was leaked to the public last weekend. Actually it reveals nothing that we didn't already suspect. But it does show that the government has known all along that, besides arsenic, lead, mercury, radon, strontium and plutonium, one more extremely deadly and pervasive element also exists. This startling new discovery -- the heaviest element now known to science -- has been tentatively named GOVERNMENTIUM (Gv).
Conspiracy theorists speculate that Governmentium has been in existence since the time of the Manhattan Project or even the Philadelphia Experiment, and kept top-secret by the CIA. Perhaps its existence accounts for the explosive growth of bureaucracy over the last half- century. This astonishing element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0. It does, however, have 1 neutron, 15 assistant neutrons, 35 deputy neutrons, 80 vice neutrons, 145 supervisory neutrons, 165 team leader neutrons and 225 consulting neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 666.
These 666 particles are held together in the nucleus by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called "MORONS", themselves surrounded by vast and undeterminable quantities of lepton-like particles called PEONS. Since it has no electrons, Governmentium is INERT. However, it can be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, a miniscule amount of Governmentium causes a reaction which would normally take less than a second over four days to complete. Unlike all other known elements, Governmentium does not decay measured according to its half-life, but instead undergoes continuous reorganization in which assistant neutrons, deputy neutrons and vice neutrons exchange places, causing a sample mass of Governmentium to actually INCREASE over time since with each reorganization some of the PEONS inevitably become MORONS, and, finally, neutrons, thereby forming entirely new isotopes. This characteristic of PEON-MORON promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Governmentium is formed whenever MORONS anywhere reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as the "CRITICAL MORASS."
Governmentium has been found to concentrate in certain key locations such as governments, large corporations, and especially in universities. It can usually be found polluting the best appointed and best maintained buildings. Scientists warn that Governmentium is known to be toxic and recommend plenty of alcoholic fluids followed by bed rest after even low levels of exposure.
L. Neil Smith at Roadhouse Sierra - The War of Southern Aggression - How to grow the U.S. with liberty-minded individuals. Bill of Rights enforcement, and export. Now. Roadhouse Sierra membership required. Get one today. [sierra]
The President (or a presidential candidate) should declare that any of the states of Mexico -- especially those closest to the border, or with the plushest resorts or the richest oil fields -- that ratify our Bill of Rights by a 2/3 majority will be admitted to the Union. Aaron Zelman and I discussed this idea in our novel Hope, but let me repeat it for the benefit of any Republicans reading this: any Mexican state that ratifies the Bill of Rights by a 2/3 majority will be allowed to add another star to Old Glory.
If nobody in office makes the offer, it can be made by Pat Buchanan or anyone else perceived to be a heartbeat (or some other bodily noise) away from the Presidency.
Sheldon Richman at The Future of Freedom Foundation - An Astounding Remark - The "USA PATRIOT" act was bad enough. That the attorney general of the U.S. would chastise people for warning about this piece of despicable despotism is unbelievable. And then Chuckie Schumer has the gall to tell us that only bigger government can provide future security. No, Chuckie, Mr. Colt has already provided for our security. You just keep your government out of the way, and we'll do fine. [sierra]
When Attorney General John Ashcroft told the nation, "To those who scare peace-loving people with phantoms of lost liberty, my message is this: Your tactics only aid terrorists," he wasn't blazing any new trails. He was merely doing what despots and would-be despots always do: attempting to intimidate into silence those who dare to question him.
Garry Reed, The Loose Cannon Libertarian - Revenge of the Bill of Rights - Mr. Reed imagines what would happen if citizens returned some of the "favors" imposed on us by our so-called representatives.
Once upon a time, in a revolutionary new nation far far away, America belonged to you, me, my second cousin Guido's adopted niece, and everyone else who went by the title "citizen." Representatives represented citizens because citizens authorized them to. Since citizens could carry arms, they authorized soldiers and cops to carry arms. Since citizens could make a "citizen's arrest" or become bounty hunters, they authorized Deputy Dawg to hunt down criminals and make arrests.
Simply put, a representative - who is still a citizen even when he's engaging in the act of representing - couldn't do anything a citizen couldn't do. If an individual can't do something, a gaggle of individuals can't do it either. If I don't have authority to tax my neighbors, I can't authorize a group called "government" to tax them for me. How can I give authority I don't have to give?
("The people cannot delegate to government the power to do anything which would be unlawful for them to do themselves." - John Locke.)
David Borden at DRCNet - On Freedom, Rights and Duties - a salute to those who have given their liberty and even their lives in fighting to end the war on freedom, er... some drugs. [drcnet]
DRCNet - Radical Party Putting Manchester Police in a Pickle over Pot Cafe, Cops Unappreciative - some members of the Transnational Radical Party have turned themselves in at British police stations in open possession of pot. Two were arrested, but a third was not. They did, however, steal his stash.
Pannella added that Chris Davies' act of civil disobedience was a key skirmish in "a battle for a fair law to decriminalize the rights and duties of the citizens and to defeat the monopoly of drug traffickers that affects many aspects of society. This action," Pannella explained, "has been undertaken to demonstrate that the application of these laws is no longer supported, neither by the judges nor by police officers. As Socrates in Athens, we are today publicly violating an unfair law, to obtain a new one that comes from the heart of citizens and doesn't create criminals. Prohibition creates crimes," Pannella said, "and against this situation we want to create a new order founded on freedom, rights and duties."
Denise A. Raymo at MAPInc - Asset Confiscations Urged - stealing people's property for felony drug "crimes" isn't enough for Franklin County (NY) DA Derek Champagne. He's holding a public hearing to ask residents whether to rip off smaller operators as well. So-called asset forfeiture is nothing but theft misspelled. The criminals here are the legislators who create such abominations and the police who enforce them. But you knew that. [drugsense]
Steve Trinward at Rational Review - Is Jefferson Smith Just a Myth? Part Two of Three - the problems with Carla Howell's campaign for governor of Massachusetts. I agree that she is a lack-luster speaker. I heard her stump speech at last year's Massachusetts Libertarian convention. It was a good speech, but she recited it by heart as if she were reading it from a teleprompter.
Thomas L. Knapp at Rational Review - Prisoners, Spanish and American - compares GW's state of the union address to the Spanish Prisoner swindle, which most of us experience fairly often as email requests for help in recovering a fortune from Nigeria. Not a great comparison, but his points about Bush'es speech are apt.
Mr. Bush wants to give us a nation that looks like every hokey, comedic portrayal of the Third Reich ever made, complete with goose-stepping, monocled Himmler clones demanding "your papers, citizen."
Robert O'Harrow Jr. at The Washington Post -
Intricate Screening Of Fliers In Works: Database Raises Privacy
Concerns 
- the f.a.a. intends to link airline reservation systems
with other databases with the supposed intention of identifying
potential terrorists. They plan to assign a "threat index" to every
passenger on every flight. Big Brother is watching. [cowlix]
Rick Stanley at Armed Females of America - This is my country. I won't leave it! - Mr. Stanley is the Colorado senate candidate who got himself arrested by wearing a handgun in a holster in Denver. His brother warned him that if he continues his campaign against the U.S. government, "they will have you killed." This is exactly why his campaign is so important. [kaba]
SaveOurGuns.com - Marion Pritchard - She shot a Nazi to save Jewish Children - the story of a Dutch woman who, one morning in 1942, killed a nazi who entered her house looking for the children she was hiding. Bravo, Ms. Pritchard!
