It's Time to Call it Quits
NOT Hillary Clinton at Iowahawk - satire. A translation of Hitlary's infamous Bobby Kennedy reference, for those who have forgotten how evil she is. She wouldn't ever say this in public, but I'd bet it's exactly what she meant. Funny, too. [root]
First, let me congratulate Senator Obama and his staff for running a tough campaign. He has been a worthy sparring partner, and one I would have once been happy to consider for my vice presidential undercard, had he not been a constant pain in my ass for the last six months. But even Senator Obama must know at this point that, even if he somehow pulls off a miracle by sweeping the remaining primaries and locking up all the contested superdelegates, he simply cannot escape the inevitable mysterious accident that will clear the Democratic nomination for Yours Truly.
...
Though he may be young and inexperienced, I am confident Senator Obama will choose wisely. But to sweeten the pot, I am also prepared to guarantee him a post as Secretary of HUD in my administration, plus a two-year moratorium on plane crashes involving his senior campaign staff and immediate family. Senator Obama is a young man, and if he serves me loyally he will be eligible to run again in 2016. Barring any unforeseen changes to Presidential term limits.